It’s been over a year of sheltering in place for the majority of us, and that sheltering in place has looked different for many. Some families have been able to isolate within their extended families and others, like myself, have been states removed from family. As a military spouse, this is honestly a reality of life, not living near family or established friends, regardless of a pandemic. But the distance in time between family holiday and summer break visits has been greater this past year. As we start to see a recession in new COVID-19 cases and more widespread vaccine use, I feel we’re starting to see a finish line to this very stressful and uncertain event we have all collectively experienced as a cultural society. But I’m sure everyone is wondering- what’s life going to look like once this virus has been kept under control?
One thing that is certain, at least within my circle of friends, there has been some major growth during this pandemic. I can only speak for myself, but I’ve had a great personal and spiritual growth happen within me during this time. Which has led me to ponder, what’s it going to be like when I integrate back into my familial and friend visits? Often times, when a person has grown personally or spiritually, the people in their life don’t hold such high regard for that growth. Often times, the person on the other side may see this as a threat, as a sign that the person will no longer want to be with them. And sometimes, the person who did grow may find that some people in their life are no longer a source of the kind of energy that they once needed. So, what do you do if you find that someone who you once enjoyed being with and loved is now a source of negative energy, or simply, you no longer see eye to eye?
You always have options for this type of scenario, and this is not something that is only experienced from this isolation we’ve been in. This can happen anytime you decide to make a positive change in your life and you put in the work for your fruition. People in your life may see that change and not respond in a supportive manner. I have personally experienced this many times and, through the help of a mental health therapist, she showed me that relationships are like seasons- some will last a long time, some will be relatively short. We have to recognize and embrace that mindset with people and relationships. But what prompted me to write this was something I read this morn from Swami Satchidananda. He was giving a talk about mosquitos and how it is their duty to bite and draw blood, and it is our duty as humans to love. It doesn’t mean that we allow the mosquito to bite us, but that it is our duty to recognize the actions of this annoying bug, shoo it away, and love it anyway. Now to tie that in to human relations, there are always going to be toxic and negative people in the world, in our world- but it is our duty to love them anyway. We can choose to not allow those people to give us their toxic energy and we can still love them from afar. This is when we have to learn about and implement healthy boundaries, but love can be part of that boundary. Love for our sacredness and self-respect, and love for another who really needs it. There are lots of great resources on boundary work and I also recommend telehealth with a mental health practitioner to learn how to integrate this work.
Maybe you’ll come out of this pandemic as a more vibrant version of your former self because you had the time, resources, and energy to do that. That just means it was your time for self-reflection and growth. Perhaps you’re reading this and you did not have those moments of personal growth, that’s okay, this timing just wasn’t the right timing for you. But I believe that we can all have those moments of profound realization- it’s all about the timing and the openness of the individual.
No matter where you fall on this subject, I wish you many blessings and I thank you for reading this. May you be happy, may you be peaceful, may you be healthy, and may you live with ease.